Another First

Today, my friend called and asked if H and I wanted to join she and her family on a trek to New Hampshire for lunch and a movie at Chunky's Cinema Pub, for a show that was starting in an hour-and-a-half. I jumped at the chance, as I had been too tired after sitting for another mom in my co-op until 1am to take J to work this morning in order to have the car. Thus, the alternative was a very looooooooooooooong day with H at home; his third day in a row without planned activities.

Being very relieved that I'd taken a shower prior to J's departure this morning, I hastily flat-ironed my hair and applied a quick swipe of make-up. H, miraculously, was incredibly cooperative in the getting ready process as he usually takes great glee in having me chase him around in my increasingly ungainly romp with his shoes in one hand and clean diaper in the other.

The drive to NH was pretty, and H caught a quick nap. He awoke when I took him out of his carseat into the biting wind of the day, snuggling into my shoulder. When we got inside, the loud pinging of arcade games assured he was awake, and I was pleasantly surprised to learn that admission was only $5.50 for adults and H was free.

We quickly found an available table in the darkening theatre, and I situated H's high-chair next to my plush leather seat, which had been re-purposed as a theatre seat from a Cadillac limo...that's what I call viewing in style!

The lights were dim, and I squinted at the menu...yes, you get to order real food, and have it delivered to your table by prompt and friendly staff. As I was deliberating, I noted that H was enthralled and it hit me; This is his FIRST movie in a theatre! Well, that's not entirely true, as I took him every Monday during maternity leave to the Mommy Matinee at Kennedy School in Portland, but this is the first movie that he was conscious of.

We saw The Water Horse, which was a little more frightening/startling in some parts than I thought it would be, and I worried a little that it would scare him. Of course, it didn't. I thought back to the first movie that I can remember going to and realized that it was Flight of the Navigator which has similarly alien-looking creatures, with loud music and surprises, and I loved it.

After eating his entire lunch, H sat in my lap, resting his head against my chest. It brought me back to the days when I sank into the couches at McMenamins for those Mommy Matinees and H slept peacefully on my chest. A couple of times, C kicked against H's back, but I don't think he felt it.

There I was, with both boys in my lap, and it seemed for the first time to really hit me that it's not just going to be H and I anymore. I find that I'm far more emotional about how H will react to C, than I am about any fear I have about my adjustment to caring for a second child.

Due to J's inevitable career path, we will have more money and security with our other kids, allowing them to have "more" than H does, but he will be the only child who gets us to himself. I hope that counts for something. My wish for H is that he always understands that in the big ways, he is our most important first, and nothing can replace that.

At least I have one certainty; my parents are totally lying when they deny they have a "favorite", my oldest sister has to have that honor...they're just too nice to say.