Friday, November 7, 2008


Today, I received notification that Chasing Harry Winston was available for pick-up at the library. As I had just finished the beloved bedraggled book, I decided to return it at the same time.

I felt a sense of triumph as they scanned the rumpled tome without fanfare. However, because I have Tourette's of the Catholic Guilt variety, the whole sordid tale came tumbling out and before long there was a conference of librarians, shaking heads and clucking tongues whereupon it was decided that they could not possibly circulate a book in this condition. When I asked why, I was returned with a 'WHY?!' As if I were the most simple of plebes. Apparently a lack of missing or torn pages, a cover that is unscathed (the wrinkles are only on the clear plastic cover applied by the library) and intact and a bibliophilic dedication to book retrieval (aka risking my life in traffic) are not the only requirements for circulation.

She happily informed me that I would now be the proud owner of Case Histories by Kate Atkinson, and that I would be blessed with the honor of donating a copy of said book, valued at $24. I asked if I could purchase it myself and they said that was fine as long as it was in good condition...'better than this one, you mean?'

Driving home I had the brilliant plan to write a gushy and witty letter to the author, in hopes that she would find me and my plight so charming that she'd send a complimentary copy. Unfornutaley, a quick search of the internet did not show direct contacts for her...seriously, why don't all award-winning authors have, if not a blog, then at least a personal webpage with contact information? Maybe to ward off stalkers like me.
Alas, I found a copy of the hardbound book in "very good" condition on Amazon for $12.


Anonymous said...
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Mrs. V said...

Now you know for next time to not say a word:). They probably have your name flagged on the computer to check your books every time when they come in. Watch out!

I can't wait to hear how Chasing Harry Winson (I couldn't remember the exact spelling right now) is.

Crafty Mama said...

You'd think that sweep into traffic would've counted for something!! Librarians aren't a very forgiving bunch. I have Tourette's of the Catholic Guilt too....I would've spilled it just as quickly. :)

Always Home and Uncool said...

When I become a famous author, you can be first stalker. Promise.

Sally HP said...

lurVis...they better not be checking them, since I was so honest! you really promise? Be careful what you wish for!

Alex Elliot said...

What?! Can you just rip the plastic cover off and give the book back?