Saturday, November 29, 2008

Urine It To Win It

I awoke to C's cries at 3:30am to find H sprawled sideways in my bed. After feeding C and putting back in his own bed, I returned to place H in a normal sleeping position and did a cursory check of his diaper to ensure that it wasn't indicative of a pending accident.

With the all-clear granted, I drifted back to blissful sleep for what I hoped would be more than an hour...what felt like about five minutes later but was really 3 hours H exclaimed "Oh no! I peed!"
This didn't seem like a big deal as he had a diaper on, but it seems that you get what you pay for in the leak department and the generic diapers are not the Hoover Dam that is Huggies Overnights. My fingers crept over to find a lovely wetness and I hustled H out of bed to strip the sheets, dab dab dab, cover in baking soda and wait for it to dry.
Wait...a cursory glance at the clock informed me that J's 24-hour shift officially ended an hour ago, so with sign-out and travel time he'd be home in about 10 minutes. Awesome. Definitely not enough drying time. Luckily H's external alarm caught the flow fairly quickly and the mattress was not terribly wet.
About a week ago, I'd told J that since I was cloth diapering, I may as well give up diapers completely and just surrender to the piles of laundry that potty training would create. Turns out, the laundry isn't what will be the road block, it's the absolute tedium of trekking to the bathroom every 30 20 10 minutes, stripping down (because why would you leave your pants and underwear on to go to the bathroom?) and sitting on the toilet. And sitting on the toilet. Aaaaaaaaand sitting on the toilet.
Because I realized that I'm supremely unmotivated in this area, I talked with a friend whose son was potty trained (day and night) over the course of 3 days. And she's not kidding. If your child is indicating that they're ready, it's best to go whole hog and just get rid of the diapers altogether, I was told, as they are generally used as a crutch by the parents. Great. I'm not only unmotivated, I'm also a cripple.
So, since I didn't have any plans today anyway, I decided to be serious and H is in his Thomas the Train briefs as we speak. I've got hand lotion at the ready (because if I wash my hands one more time without applying moisture afterward, they're going to crack off) and I'm trying to prep my emotional reserves to be Zen mother.
I can't wait for the power struggle to ensue.

4 comments:

Mrs. V said...

Creative title:). I would suggest getting a plastic matress cover just while you are going through your day and night training so that you won't have a permanent reminder (stench) of his potty training days. It seemed like A was never going to get potty training down, but then she just did it all at once. I kept the diapers on at night but realized they were always dry. I think trying to do it in a couple of days will probably work. Once he has it down you could take the plastic off your bed because he would probably have very infrequent accidents.

Mrs. V said...

As mom and dad were reading this I said can you imagine working 24 hours and then not being able to lay down in your bed? Dad chuckled and said, "Kind of like coming home from Germany and finding holes poked in your waterbed." I thought you would appreciate the comment.

Dad was getting his breakfast as mom read and he thought she said "den" mother. Dad said, "H isn't big enough to be in cub scouts." We clarified that it was zen mom and mom was thinking what if Sally had to coordinate a cub scouts troop in the midst of potty training. I guess that is one more thing to add to your I am thankful for... list.

Amy, Bryan and Zoey said...

OH GOD. Just yesterday I made my/Zoey's first "big girl panty" purchase at Target but now I am thinking of keeping said panties hidden for awhile, until I AM READY for potty training. Thanks for the good laugh...I'm sure H will catch on soon!!!

Lynn said...

I love your sense of humor- you are friggin' hillarious!!