Pet Peeve

As a new subscriber to the Lion Brand Notebook, which is a blog regarding 'News, Ideas and Information for Crafting with Yarn' I read this post. Aparrently, there is a new movement of people who are knitting with their pet's fur. WHAT?! Yes, you read correctly k-n-i-t-t-i-n-g with their pet's fur. According to the post, even Martha Stewart is in on this one, planning to have a skein of yarn made out of her dog Paw Paw's fur.

As I forced the mini-vomit back down my throat I thought to myself, these must be some die-hard yarn crafters, as I could not imagine that somebody else was doing this for them. Oh no, no...never fear. There is a service to meet every need. VIP Fibers is a Texas-based company who specializes in 'Mail Order Custom Handspun Yarn from Your Very Important Pets!' They do warn, however; 'Many dogs and cats have a fine and lustrous undercoat so suitable for spinning. It does not, however, have the crimp or elasticity such as found in wool from a sheep, and therefore is not suitable for all projects such as socks.' Yeah, because your feet didn't stink enough, now they'd smell like wet dog on top of it!

How, you may ask me, is this different than using any other natural fiber, such as wool or alpaca? Well, because the last time I pet a labrador or a freaky cat that was shedding everywhere, I don't remember thinking to myself "Oh my God, this would feel so luxurious in the form of a cozy sweater." It was more like "Sick, now I have to go wash my hands."

Yes, I agree that part of this is my own issue, as I have always been slightly grossed out by stray pet hair, and have to repress the urge to wipe stray hairs off of my pant-leg when Snookems rubs against me in their owner's presence. That said, I am not anti-animal or a proponent of shaved/hairless pets, and I understand that household pet hair is an unavoidable part of owning something that has fur and having them share your living space. HOWEVER, my understanding of that issue does not extend to the point of wanting to wear the animal, or make a sweet dream catcher out of it.

Even my friends who love their pets thought that the idea of this was gross, and I know that they own several lint rollers with which to 'de-fur' themselves before leaving the house. Honestly, when I read this blog post, I was almost waiting for a gotcha! at the end of it, but alas, I must just sit at my computer and silently shake my head shivering with repulsion at the thought.

One must admit that there is a slightly Hannibal-esque quality to it..."I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti." Except now, you wore your pet hair with some corduroys and a nice turquoise bangle.